Wednesday, June 1, 2022

Bendigo Strange

I'm often reminded of Kevin Costner's character John Dunbar in Dances with Wolves when I come here. In both the book and the movie, there comes the point when after living with the Sioux for a period of time he returns to Fort Sedgwick and remembers how his adventure began. So to is it when I come back here to revisit something I wrote earlier. Sometimes for a quick reference, othertimes from a sense of nostalgia. Somewhere buried in the comments before the bots took it over, is perhaps my favorite thing anyone ever said here. It goes something like "You can see his love of story telling and writing. You can also unfortunately, see his total disregard for the basic rules of writing and proper grammar". No truer words were ever written and they make me laugh everytime I come across it. One merely has to read the old Dark Arts for Good Guys series to enjoy three or four thousand word posts filled with run on sentences.

While no doubt the world of data collection would and does continue to collect everything we ever do online, Google included, Blogger for all of it's ills will always be ingrained in my heart. It gave me a place to land all of the words, thoughts, and skills I ever wanted to say. To this day my email will still see the pop up question "where can I find the second part of Non Permissive Environment?", I can only say if you can find the second season of Firefly, you can find part II of that particular piece. Buried in the "never going to be published" Drafts section is an article titled "Just Garrote with it", which was to be about the fine art of choking someone with whatever was at hand so you can make a hasty escape from whatever circumstances you got into.

So what happened?

Why did it all stop?

Life I guess one could say. A child came along, a business partnership, a shoulder injury that was pervasive for three years that led to chronic pain. Maybe it was all three of those things, but in some respects it was just one. Fatherhood. At the height of the Dark Arts came a baby and I found myself far more interested in that role than I did writing, especially about such viceral topics. The "tactical" community always likes to wage a war on contentment. I've seen it over and over. From keyboard jockeys to former Navy SEALs who somehow make a living running and screaming at a cell phone camera.

It can be hard, this life. No doubt, as of this writing no one needs to tell anyone in the Ukraine that. I've certainly seen hard times, and some circumstances that I didn't think I was going to make it out of, but later I found myself in a place I didn't want to leave either. A screened in porch playing at a water table with a baby, a high country camp where the deep blue of a Montana or Idaho sky is only interrupted by the stark contrast of the dark green pines, or a dining table on a cold winter's night mug of coffee in hand talking with friends.

The work continued though of course. Stalkers, kidnappings, late night departures from home. Solving or resolving the life problems of other people for pay. That part never stopped, and if anything found an increase on my time. On a flight to Tampa a couple years, before the onslaught of the chaos that would become 2020, I started sketching out a new idea, one for the book that has been so often asked about. A moleskine here filled with outlines, another here with thoughts and then came a name "Bendigo Strange". From that one thing ended and another began. The writing that has seen such an elongated pause here, since it's first post seventeen years ago....seventeen years, has begun again elsewhere, but in doing so brings an end to this place, once and for all. Not easy words to write, but certainly straightforward.

It is my hope that you will read this and follow this new path, with some old familiar lines there. So if you are inclined you may find me over at

Bendigo Strange

I'm often reminded of Kevin Costner's character John Dunbar in Dances with Wolves when I come here. In both the book and the movie,...